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Sunday, November 20, 2005

K,let's talk about this. Let's just get it all out my system despite the backlashing i know will eventually happen.

I am sorry for changing. Yes, there was a point of time that i was beyond incorrigible. i kow you hated me being like that. And you wanted me to change. When i eventually did and only went out with the only one that you know i like, you still said i haven't changed. Yes, credits go to you for waking me up. And i am sorry i slipped up but aren't humans even allowed to? No, instead when people slip up and does not take advices, you leave them alone. Besides, that is friendship, isn't it? No, it isn't.

For now, all i wanna think about are the times we had and shared. And i have never regretted one bit , not even this permanent fight. I have never regretted the people i formed bonds with, the ones that was crammed in a class for two years. The people i would never let go. Call me weak, call me whatever you want. All i know is that, i dun let go of people. Never. Especially you guys.

Stop this high school shit, i am not asking people to take sides. I just dun want to be alienated. Yes, paranoid, call me childish but circumstances have showed that friendship can really end anytime. Shocking. I am not trying to pick a fight. just clearing my thoughts in my own diary.

Yes, i was not the Zulaikha everybody knew for a while, i got sidetracked. I am only human. You went thru that before, and people's judgement is inevitable. but yours? that's sad.
Maybe i am kental or whatever for thinking about this but i just care. too much maybe.
And it sucks that whatever consequences of my wrongdoing in the past is only catching up with me now, when i have changed so much. Well, everyone judge everyone nowadays, right?

And yes, i like Narin. Sorry. But i am not pinning hopes on him. Ever. i just like the guy. Noe, even more so.

Sorry for growing and words just can't touch me much. i am sorry.